A Work in Progress. . .My Dance with Arrogance
I got to thinking this evening about some nasty accusations that were hurled at me in the recent past. The comments that were made were made by an individual with the obvious intention of doing nothing more than being hurtful, and it would be very easy to just dismiss them outright, but I think that it is a valuable thing to consistently evaluate oneself (self-deception and denial are such easy traps for us humans to fall into).
This individual accused me of being arrogant. This is charge that is hard to either validate or refute, as it is highly subjective. . .in one sense, the fact that I feel VERY good about who I am and what I do, would, in many people's minds, make me a very arrogant person. I think I am an awesome person with awesome ideas and I do awesome things. If pride equals arrogance, then I am guilty as charged.
I do, however, think that there is another element to the idea of "arrogance". I think that true arrogance is not rooted in one's appreciation of oneself, but in the need to diminish others and to make OTHER people look bad in order to make oneself look good. I certainly know that I have been guilty of that in the past. . .and, I am forced to admit, that I struggle with that at times now.
The circumstance in question is related to some comments that I made about a former acquaintance, Mark Crawford. . .Mark and I were in times past "less than friends", but in retrospect, I recognize that while we had certain differences of opinion regarding music, people, etc; on the whole he is a decent person, just trying to make sense out of the world like everyone else. Even though there may be things that he said or did in the past that I personally thought were less than admirable, I also need to keep in mind that I have too. God forbid that I should be judged based on the ways that I handled myself 10 or 15 years ago. I hope that if Mark has the opportunity to read this, he will know that I have nothing but good thoughts for him.
I think that may be the key, though. I KNOW what a turd I tend to be sometimes. I make no bones about that fact. I fall flat on my face more times than I care to think. I hope to be judged, not by my individual successes and failures, but by the overall road that I try to travel down.
If I am guilty of anything, it is not arrogance, but it is an occasional bout of hypocrisy, in that I sometimes fail to afford that same charity to others... judging them on one or two isolated incidents rather than trying to understand the whole of their character. Lord willing I will continue to be aware of this and work on it in my life.
This individual accused me of being arrogant. This is charge that is hard to either validate or refute, as it is highly subjective. . .in one sense, the fact that I feel VERY good about who I am and what I do, would, in many people's minds, make me a very arrogant person. I think I am an awesome person with awesome ideas and I do awesome things. If pride equals arrogance, then I am guilty as charged.
I do, however, think that there is another element to the idea of "arrogance". I think that true arrogance is not rooted in one's appreciation of oneself, but in the need to diminish others and to make OTHER people look bad in order to make oneself look good. I certainly know that I have been guilty of that in the past. . .and, I am forced to admit, that I struggle with that at times now.
The circumstance in question is related to some comments that I made about a former acquaintance, Mark Crawford. . .Mark and I were in times past "less than friends", but in retrospect, I recognize that while we had certain differences of opinion regarding music, people, etc; on the whole he is a decent person, just trying to make sense out of the world like everyone else. Even though there may be things that he said or did in the past that I personally thought were less than admirable, I also need to keep in mind that I have too. God forbid that I should be judged based on the ways that I handled myself 10 or 15 years ago. I hope that if Mark has the opportunity to read this, he will know that I have nothing but good thoughts for him.
I think that may be the key, though. I KNOW what a turd I tend to be sometimes. I make no bones about that fact. I fall flat on my face more times than I care to think. I hope to be judged, not by my individual successes and failures, but by the overall road that I try to travel down.
If I am guilty of anything, it is not arrogance, but it is an occasional bout of hypocrisy, in that I sometimes fail to afford that same charity to others... judging them on one or two isolated incidents rather than trying to understand the whole of their character. Lord willing I will continue to be aware of this and work on it in my life.
posted by Thomas J. at 10/04/2005 08:25:00 PM
2 Comments:
"Tommy Thunderfingers,"
I haven't seen you since college, but I would say arrogance is an adjective the probably best describes you; or at least it used to. I am glad you are calling it a work in progress. Arrogance is a strong weapon that pushes people away very quickly. It may have worked against you in big ways without you even knowing it.
Certainly that is true stranger. . .of that there is no doubt. Ah, of course, the sins of our youth sometimes DO haunt us.
I would LOVE to do my part to make amends to those that my ignorance and arrogance of the past have hurt or offended. I wish that you would feel free to come back at another time, take of the mask of your anonymoty, and allow me to make things right with you! Thanks so much for stopping by!
Post a Comment
<< Home